In her 11-year career as an office manager, Debra Irene shared the mission and core values of her employer, a vibrant and growing U.S. energy company. She had reason to feel secure in her job—until the company sold.

Her boss, the founder, would be stepping down. Suddenly, he would be gone and, she worried, her job might be gone, too. What she didn’t realize was that her work history and a valued character trait would open a door and lead to a welcome new opportunity.

Here’s what happened. And, yes, since companies are restructured, reorganized, merged or sold, it could happen to you.

What’s Important

Before giving up control of the company, Irene’s boss, then chairman and CEO, opened up a conversation. “He asked what I liked about my job as office manger. He said, ‘What do you like to do? There could be some different opportunities for you,’ ” Irene remembers.

“Off the record, I thought ‘I like to drink coffee’. I knew he didn’t mean that,” she says.

“It was a hard question to answer because I wore many hats. I liked to do many things, from managing his calendar, meetings and travel schedules, supervising staff and all the day-to-day operations. I said, ‘if I’m going to have different options, let me think about it. I hadn’t done that for a long time.”

In later conversations, he assured her that if she were willing to go with him, there would be a job opportunity. “As we were talking, he told me the most important thing to him was trust.”

The Rest Of The Story

Right now, Irene is a yet-untitled assistant to her former boss in a newly-created Limited Liability Company/LLC. A regular contributor to a blog and consumer magazines, she is the author of Reflections,musings on life’s crossroads and defining moments.

Her reflection on the nature of working relationships is this: “The biggest thing that builds trust is time. It is acquired over several years. You can’t own that immediately.”

In other words, trust is like wages. It’s earned.

Trustworthy? A Survey Says That We’re No Angels

Build your career on knowledge, skills and experience, yes. Build your reputation on trustworthiness and earn respect. Honesty, good judgment, competence, confidentiality, reliability, and accountability are among influential character traits that make others want to work with and for you.

Unfortunately, less admirable qualities are mixed into in the work environment, too. Manipulation, deceit, passive-aggressiveness, and undependability undermine professional relationships and erode a foundation of trust.

The question is, can you count on managers and coworkers in your workplace? Can they count on you? Respondents to a recent survey by Tulsa-based Hogan Assessments revealed that we’re less than perfect. According to a report in the Wall Street Journal, here’s what the numbers showed:

•   81% said they believed they had been cheated or otherwise treated dishonestly by a colleague.

•   10% admitted they had been perpetrators of such acts, including being deceitful or “playing dirty” to advance their own careers.

•   52% listed arrogance as a trait of the worst manager or coworker.

•   50% said their worst boss was manipulative.

•   44% described a bad boss or colleague as one who is passive-aggressive.

•   74% said they trust their coworkers.

•   70% said they trust their boss.

If numbers don’t lie, there’s plenty of room for improvement. The concern is that high performers in an unhappy work environment tend to move on. If you are a conscientious employee and your trustworthy traits are strong, trust this: You’ll be valued, either where you work now or where you’ll work in the future.

Trust & Integrity

Is there one trait that everyone needs to have if they want to succeed? Yes, Dr. Heidi Grant-Halvorson said inForbes magazine. “That key trait is trustworthiness.”

Behaviors that indicated low self-control—being lazy, late, disorganized, excessively emotional, unreliable or quick-tempered—cause collateral damage to our reputation. When your boss doesn’t trust you, opportunities pass you by. You don’t get plum assignments, promotions or the latitude to take responsibility and do things your own way, said Grant-Halvorson, author of Succeed: How We Can Reach Our Goals.

On the other hand, when employees don’t trust the boss, they don’t give their best effort, she said.

Distrust Breeds Discontent

Sadly, once trust has been broken, it’s hard to rebuild. And distrust breeds discontent. So, as in other matters of health and well-being, prevention is the best remedy.

Whether we work as an employer or employee, self-assessment helps us get a glimpse of who we are and how others might see us, too. Grab your pen and learn a bit about yourself.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) apologize when I miss a deadline or make a mistake.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) betray a confidence or repeat confidential information about an individual or the company.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) honor my agreements or do what I say I will do.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) ask for more time or help if I can’t meet a goal or deadline.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) express gratitude to others for their help, support or team effort.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) frivolously berate a colleague or my employer.

•   I am (always, sometimes, rarely) trustful of higher-ups, subordinates, the company or organization that employs me.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) pin the blame on others and make excuses for myself.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) consult an authority or decision-maker if I’m in doubt about ethical procedures, policies or protocol.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) communicate with coworkers, teammates or supervisors to clarify goals, monitor progress and report results.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) surpass the company’s expectations, or my own.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) consult the most ethical and successful people I know and model their behavior.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) tell someone to handle added responsibilities, rather than asking.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) arrive at work early and promptly return from breaks.

•   I (always, sometimes, rarely) arrive late.

For Grant-Halvorson’s assessments, click on her website.

What To Do

If you are aware of a flagrant violation of procedures or company policies, use: Discretion. Diplomacy. Documentation.

•   Discreetly and confidentially document time, place, violation and identities.

•   Diplomatically (unemotionally) report the infraction to the appropriate superior (manager, supervisor or HR director)….”